Love was my test

Before I knew what love was, I thought it was easy like when you love, you expect to be loved back. When you give, you expect to receive something back.

When you’re hurt love can easily comfort you. I thought love was my medicine when I was hurting deeply. I thought love was my ally when the world pounded me and bombarded me with painful wounds.

I was wrong, love was my test.

Love was my enemy, love was the measurement of how I really want to spend my life with somebody. Love was never my redemption, love was there even to the point of my execution. Love stood under my umbrella. Love held me when I was drowning in my insanity.

Love stood beside me when the heavy eyes of the world judged me. Love built a roof when problems rained on me. Love taught me to dance in the rain. And when I was able to stand up and be strong again, love fulfilled his duty and then left me.

#Thankyou

Sun vs Moon 

“​I am the Sun and You are my Moon.”
We are worlds apart, we’re different from each other.

I give light to people, to bright and lovely people who were loving me.

You give hope to people, to sad and lonely people in the evening.

I’m just a Sun giving light, sharing smiles with them.

You’re a Moon, giving directions, hope and guide.
I’m just a Sun giving heat, gives out harmful rays, to hurt their skin.

They hate me because I’m causing them to sweat that much especially the teens.

That’s just my purpose, to add up to their problem—just another distraction.

I’m just a crap that occupies space, that deserves destruction.
But you, you are the moon that mesmerizes people at night.

A symbol that there is always still hope even at dark times.

Yes, you’re not that bright , you are not as big as a star, But girl, you show that we should be always might, you help us to be tight—I became inspired when you’re at sight.

You’re not always right, but you are a guide.

Helping the lost people to find their way home, to be back on track.
You amaze me,

You make me smile and feel happy,

but i think that’s just that,

we’re just meant to meet on our path.

an eclipse,

but nothing more.

Yeah it hurts,

but please,

continue to inspire me more.
– By Omar  // Moon, Inspiring the Sun.
“You are the Sun and I am the Moon.”
I stare, I wonder and I adore.

Your bright rays, they always wander,

Unto the hearts of people,

Warming up their cold selves.

I look at you from the other side,

And I can’t help but think,

Damn boy, you’re the light that everyone needs.
So you see, dear Sun,

You’re not that bad,

You aren’t the one on the darkness’ embrace,

You aren’t the one to witness,

Whenever the Boogeyman,

Goes in and out of the houses,

Spreading terror,

Clouding my name,

Associating it with him.
Because you, my dear Sun,

You equate to hope for others,

Your coming and going,

They symbolize new beginning,

And that, my dear,

Is the best thing you can be
-By Ana // My Dear Sun 

P.s. My first collaboration with very talented young man Omar’s from Turkey. I’m very Happy to work with him.

(Artwork By unknown )

The wither love 


I think about you every day.

Every day in the enclosure of my dream world.

I hope about you every day,

that you will live the life you´re keen of.
The words that have been left unsaid,

the deeds that were left unforgiven,

the proofs that took my pride and yet

nobody answers or received it…
Some day you might just know the difference

of who I were and what was I to give you.

Some day I might not mind the distance

and the cold you left for me to fear of.
Someday the wind might gently whisper

something of a faded memory 

and somehow you will suddenly remember me

inside the warmest sunrays that I am now sending..

And if this memory becomes a smile,

and if this smile becomes a heartbeat,

I hope it fills you even for a moment or a while-

so I will know this love has never wither. 

~~~~

Hiraeth

You were fond of feeling my face on your palms

And I would automatically hold your hands

Now I’m lost, with no hands to hold –

My hand will always long to touch you
In a room full of people I love

Or on a busy street with strangers 

During the rush of manic Mondays –

My eyes will always search for you
I crave the sound of your voice
Even with the hectic schedule

I still pause in the middle of it all –

My mind will always wander to get to you

My life ,you’ve changed when you came

And after you left, I will never be the same

I tear a little at the bittersweet realization –

My heart will always yearn for you.

Survivor 

Life is a crazy ride, especially in a world as wide and wild as this.There are always going to be ups and downs. 

The people and things that you love today may not be the same that you will in a year, a month, or even tomorrow. Sometimes life doesn’t go the way you planned for it to.Sometimes the people you need the most leave, but that’s okay.

But, as bad as it was, I learned something about myself.

I would be lying if I said that I remember how many nights I spent crying on the floor. I would be lying if I said that I thought that I would make it through this storm. I never knew life could get so dark or that I could feel so low, but it happened. 

I never knew how strong I could really be until you left me with no other choice.That I could go through something like that and survive.

When you love someone with all of your heart, it takes the wind out of you when they break the very thing they said they’d protect. When you involve someone in your plans for the future, it blindsides you when they walk away. When your life is so intertwined with another’s, it takes some time to figure out where you end and they start.

I will never be able to hate you. I will never be able to resent you for what walking away. All I have to say is thank you. 

You broke me more than I ever thought was possible, but you also showed me that it’s also possible for me to be okay without you.

Love,

The Girl Who Survived

Guest post // at the open grave – by Michael 


Let it out, you can’t hold it together.

Not now, at the open grave:

Where the vulture diggers are hungry 

For another body

Stacking them high

Sprinkle dirt, flick holy water,

Tread carefully…collapse into a family member

Who hugs you too tightly, but right now

It feels right, or real.

The rain plays with us

Like a fickle child

And I am suddenly drained

Nothing touches me,

There are only lurching stomach pains

And no more sandwiches left when we arrive

I just wanted a drink, to try and help.

It doesn’t

They dug a grave in my heart today

And it stings.

                    ——————
Poetry by Michael 

Artwork ~ unknown